National Museum Musings

Mom and I in front of the Spoliarium

"What is essential in a work of art is that it should rise far above the realm of personal life and speak to the spirit and heart of the poet as man to the spirit and heart of mankind." - Carl Jung


While Juan Luna y Novicio (1857-1899) and Felix Resurreccion Hidalgo (1855-1913) were definitely not known as poets in their time, their ouvres as an artists in the field of painting have largely achieved an immortality unparalleled in our nation's history. These days, to behold the spectacles of the Spoliarium and The Assassination of Governor Bustamante, is to be immersed in the richness of our heritage. To bear witness to the ferocious verve of each of their stories captured in medias res, is to be momentarily lost: thrown into the chaos of ecclesiastically-clad tyrannicides, into the dreary gallows of fallen gladiators.

In Roman Red, in Papal White,  in the sullen and disinterested movement, in the sombre saturation of death, color is transfigured into life, and space is transformed into a living artery. In the ferocity of such a narrative, one becomes a spectator without a voice, a specter in the wings.

And yet one can't help but be moved.

One is moved by the history that seeps through the canvas. By the fiery drama of animalistic drive. By the sordid wheels of fortune. By the clash of divergence. By the protracted tale of a nation struggling to break free. By the realization that more than once in our history, we made believers out of a world that belittled our capacity to create art which not only were by all means aesthetically sound, but relevant and revolutionary.

Withdrawal Symptoms

"Sisikat nang muli ang ating araw 
Sa nayong may himig ng hanging hinipan ng banal, 
Tulad ng awit na pumipiglas sa kahon ng kundiman."
-Ang Ating Araw by Dicta License

So I've been tripping on Dicta License and Rage Against the Machine the entire day. I really miss the feeling of being on-stage with a bunch of like-minded musicians rocking it out and sharing their music with the crowd. I miss the excitement. I miss the anxiety. I miss the lights. I miss the applause. 

Actually, I miss a lot of things.

Well... Maybe, just maybe, it isn't too late to relive those moments. Just invited a bunch of friends to jam together soon. What will become of it escapes me, but it certainly is a start!

Merchant of Venice Vibe

And Shakespeare's Antonio tells it best:

In sooth I know not why I am so sad

It wearies me; you say it wearies you;

But how I caught it, found it, came by it,

What stuf tis made of, whereof it is born;

I am to learn.

And such a want-wit sadness makes out of me

That I have much ado to know myself.

:-/

Wishes and Whispers

Whatever happened to the days spent dreaming,
Where the pencils were pushed
At a pace only our minds knew,
Piecing together portraits
Immediately fleeting
Like the feeling of closing your eyes
In a summer evening
And breathing,
Believing in life
Without depravity;
Where the notes were played
With a solitary sweetness
Slowly seeping from the silence
Like a sliver of moonlight
Falling steadily on the pavement;
Where, lost perchance in the thicket,
We longed for the wind
And prayed with a whisper, like children do
For many a wish to come true.

A Testament

I suddenly realize that all my life I've been waiting for and wanting something like this all along. It's almost as if every single choice, every single decision, every single experience has been building up towards this one point where all that's left to do is to take one fantastic leap. I can only hope that things will turn out as it should. 

NBI Clearance

Extremely long day tomorrow.

Financial Matter-Loading

Studying Brealy-Myers Principles of Corporate Finance :)) It's been quite a while since finance - admittedly a feared nemesis of mine back in college - and I met face to face. But oh well... Though daunting, I hope to finish about 3-4 chapters every day til august 16. :))

Into the Workforce

So I just took Coca Cola's offer. :)

Go Ahead and Jump

"You've got to roll with the punches to get to what's real." - Van Halen

Great Leaps

So tomorrow may be the day that decides everything, huh? Well not necessarily everything, but at least the next 2-3 years of my life. Whatever happens though, I'm glad I took the risk.

Moving on though, I'm excited for my Baby Jaycee project. While we haven't finalized our output, I really feel that we have a great combination of talented people in the team. I do hope we end up planning the fun run, since it's definitely something that will challenge us and appeal to our sensibilities in the process. But to be safe, I really dunno, since there are quite a few equally interesting options available at the moment. We will probably talk about it over the weekend, and decide by Tues/Thurs, in time for the next meeting with Laurence.

Meanwhile, I am currently killing time and watching my sister do her architecture plate. Man, the level of detail in the thing is daunting. haha. Good thing I didn't pursue architecture. I can't imagine doing that kind of work on a weekly/daily basis. Ok na rin ang BS ME, despite the insane pressure and all to survive the course. :))

Burn Check Check

So now the cards are really unfolding...

Just a few minutes ago I received a call regarding tomorrow's interview/offer. Honestly I really hope everything turns out alright. Having spent a significant portion of my post-college life juggling an ever-shifting mix of bum-days, rehearsals, gimmicks here and there, it would definitely be quite nice to finally have some semblance of order. :))

GV Morning

The Good Life. Let's go on a livin spree.
Sh*t they say the best things in life are free.
                 - From the sage that is Kanye West

Technolabyrinths

I really have to break out of the cycle of mindlessly shuffling between Facebook, Twitter, Gmail, Time.com, Y! Mail for hours on end. Normally, people say you have to make a series of conscious and willful choices to break out of bad habits. But while this is easier said than done, given humanity's ultra-dependence on electronic media, I'd say it's definitely worth a shot.

So here's the game plan:
1. Check Gmail/Y!mail only thrice in any given day (but keep Apple's Mail program open just in case)
2. Use the Twitter app, not the website. Use scarcely.
3. Read Time.com and other news sites ONCE a day only.
4. Cut back Facebook usage by an hour or two every day.

It may seem trite, but trust me, given the amount of time I grind out on these things, any improvement whatsoever is better :))

Rainy Days and Tuesdays

No. They don't get me down. Well at least this specific Tuesday didn't. I sheepishly woke up to the sound of a light drizzle on my windowpane and spent majority of my afternoon traversing Makati under the Signal #1 downpour. Saw a few Makati-based friends along the way, met up with Auntie Leah at Valero, and then proceeded with the interview I had scheduled today.

Hmmm. The company's great. It's definitely one which I really wanna work for... if not for the relocation requirement inherent with the position I'm being considered for. Right now though, I don't really know. I haven't really given it much thought yet. Who knows, it may do me good to try this out.

But moving on, the rest of the day was pretty much chill. I got home early, had a couple of afternoon snacks and updated myself with current events. Who would've known CNN and BBC would turn out to be so appealing for me. haha. Maybe I am getting older. :))

***

PAG-ASA says it's Signal #2 here in MM. On twitter I see college students complain about CHED. Well it's just the usual unexplained puzzles of mankind: Why does it take forever for CHED to decide to suspend classes? And why is it that when they finally do, they toss the responsibility at the universities instead (who, in my opinion, are equally as indecisive)?

At least it's not my problem anymore. :))

Good thing I don't have any plans tomorrow. I could spend the day reading War and Peace. Or practicing my italian. Or watching a sitcom or something.

Lopsided Choices

This definitely makes things more difficult.

What TPMO Efficiency

The line I had to slither through awhile ago at the Pasig City Fire Station was terrible.

Can you believe that it literally took me 3 HOURS just to get called!

All the matching of tickets and licenses were done manually causing tremendous bottlenecking in that part of the system. In fact, compounded with the rowdiness of the people and absence of clear "lines" or the lack of waiting areas, this made the situation even more catastrophic (and even that is an understatement).

The Pasig City Traffic and Parking Management Office should definitely do something about this. While I am by no means judging the BlueBoys in their entirety, I would affirm that this aspect of their work SUCKS COMPLETELY.

A little investment in Opman would do wonders, people.

This week looks promising. After being semi-liberated from my dilemma last Friday, everything seems a bit lighter in comparison. Although I may have to wait a few more days to actually see the finalized fruits of my choice, it's all good. I have other activities to take my mind off of waiting anyway (like picking up my license from the Pasig City Fire Station or meeting up with the other BPI Foundation Scholars for this community project).

On another note, as I mentioned before, it has been a bit difficult for me to organize my thoughts lately, but I hope to jot down whatever bits and fragments I may have at this or any other time.

... So pardon the incoherence. :)

Busted Piano Keys and Jazz Lines

I really want to practice the lines in Mehegan's Jazz Improv book right now, but I busted two of my piano's keys a couple of days ago. Unfortunately, the piano repairguy can only pass by on Saturday so I have to work my way around these figures on the guitar instead. It's been quite a while since I practiced my sight reading skills, so I assume this will be quite a challenge. Hopefully I get to finish the first 20 pages tonight. It seems understandable enough. :))

Ellipsis

So I haven't exactly been writing lately. Honestly, I've been at a loss for words to describe the happenings in the space between now and the previous post. In fact, in more ways than one, I find myself struggling to come to terms with things: new responsibilities, new choices, new risks. There is so much stuff to internalize, so many realities to face. But it's definitely a blessing to have friends and family members who make transition easier. :)

An Itch

What I would give to know the next pieces of the puzzle

Blue Symphony

No shit. Words are grossly inadequate when it comes to expressing how much this family of bright and talented musicians inspire me. I mean, you could ask me till the constellations drop or something and I'd still say the same darned thing over like a broken record: There's never a day that passes without me feeling grateful for the short time I spent with these people. Truly it's been an honor to have had the opportunity to perform and share the gift of music along with them on the many stages we've graced  over the past three years. 

As a friend of mine would say, Cheers to the future! 

May Blue Symphony last till we're 65 and beyond! :)

---

Oh and people, if you do hear about a Blue Symph Concert in the future, I really do hope you take the time to check these guys out. You won't be disappointed. :)

Summer Reading List

Done

Siddhartha
The Prince
Catcher in the Rye
The Communist Manifesto
The Death of Ivan Illich

In the Oven

Don Quixote
War and Peace
Titan: The Life of John D. Rockefeller
The Merchant of Venice
Othello
100 Years of Solitude
Love in the time of Cholera

Nth Resurrection

It's funny how sometimes I'm stunned by my immediate response to the question, "How old are you?"

Uh, I'm 21.

It's standard procedure. Almost automatic even.

I mean it's strange enough that I don't feel 21 all that much, but the reality that hits me the moment my tongue lets loose those two numbers makes it all too visceral. Suddenly it dawns on me that I'm no longer a student, in the strictest sense at least (though I may return sooner than I hope, should I get into the Erasmus Mundus program).

But behold, the newly incarnated fetus-of-a-bum is resurrected from Matrixian dregs and swims in vacuous bummery. Behold the wings of outrageous fortune as they flap beyond Platonic caves, even as the sofa, in all its sullenly sunken majesty, beckons.

It's all so surreal. Two years ago, I never could've imagined myself in this position, much less surviving my course. But still I'm excited to see what the next few days/months/years will bring.